Stop Being Selfish!!

Catch this concept: very important. If Thomas Edison didn't do what he was created to do, we'd all be sitting in the dark. If you think about it, there's someone that has made a HUGE difference in your life...kinda like they came in and turn'd the light on for you and made things quite clear. They did what God intended for them to do. Now we're obligated to be the light. Let me quote ma aunt...

“When it's all said and done, I pray that my greatest achievement is not the accumulation of accolades, awards, and money, but rather that my kingdom work is done. I pray that my ministry touches the lives it was assigned to. I pray that somebody will live and not die because my assignment was completed. I pray that someone can see my life, my failures, my triumphs, and know that they too can succeed by faith.”
-Meaghan Williams

& that's the essence of it really. You weren't created to live for yourself. To fall into a lot of pointless relationships and live like there's no tomorrow. Stop being selfish!! Face it! If you don't do what you were designed to do, there are going to be a lot of people sitting in the dark. And when you see God, how are you gonna answer for that?

#random

Ma friends find it extremely weird that I go to bed with my shirt tuck'd in....

...I guess I just like to tuck ma self in...or something.

Don't Make Excuses.

The problems we think we have with our close loved ones are really problems we have with ourselves. They're just so close that our emotions reflect off of them. Therefore, giving the predicament a face...& giving us someone else to blame.

Don't make excuses.

Deal with you.

That's the only road to growth and freedom.

Invisible by Kierra Sheard

A total eclipse has just begun

We blocked out the sun

Can't bekieve this is what we've come to

So you think that you're a star

But the real star has some scars...

...on His hands and feet where the nails went through...

God is headlining this show!
To introduce Him is what I'm here for.
So without further delay...

It's time to take to the stage.
Then I move out the way.
So that they only see
You that's inside of me
Don't let me block the view
That's not what I wanna do
I wanna be see through
Make sure they see you

MAKE ME INVISIBLE!!!!!!!!

Ma Aunt may never know how much she inspires me...honestly, I may never even know, because our crazy relationship always seems to cloud my vision. Her obedience to God breaks the clouds tho...& motivates me beyond measure.

Gifted.

I'm gifted...meaning "Something given voluntarily without payment in return, as to show favor toward someone, honor an occasion, or make a gesture of assistance"...( as defined by Webster.)

& " To whom much is given, much is required."

I live to learn and teach what I learn to reach the unreachable.

Gifted I am.

But the "gifts" will never stop with me.

I promise.

MUST SEE: LIFE CHANGING!. (I promise.)

Challenge.

“Forgiveness takes a great deal of understanding…& a lot of patience. It takes acceptance. It takes maturity to try to believe that whoever hurt really didn't intend to mess up your life, but was actually doing the best they could at the time.”

#thatisall

“If someone is auditioning for a spot in your life, ignore everything they say and just watch what they do.”

#thatisall

#subtweet

You just don’t know how bad I desire you to be here with me. Like fa real…I need the insight that you currently have. I need to know how you determined your decision to do ministry full time. & the current struggles that came along with it…our childhood and teenage years were extremely similar. And our destinies are both clearly kingdom work. Why wouldn’t you want to help me? & mentor me? You’re the one I’ve always desired anyway. But I can say that I have the best now. But…you…I miss the “you” I wanted to be in my life. The one that never really existed…I guess. Clearly, I don’t need you to play such a role…I just desire it. You may have a smaller puzzle piece in my life than I desire you to have.

Only Responsibility.

Pride has been the death of so many relationships.

For example, if I was struggling with pride in a relationship and I was to get into it with whoever I’m tryna relate to, my pride will make the situation all about me. And when it comes to finding a solution, that would be all about me as well; when a relationship is about two people.

Which is why pride is the death of so many relationships.

No wonder God hates a proud look.

Tell the truth. Shame the devil.

Psssh.......I have a secret.....

I use to want to my Uncle when I grew up.......

Haha.

Not anymore...but I really admire him...a lot.

It's Time.

It’s about time I stepped up an accepted the responsibility of this call.

It forces me to grow up, because you want to reach people three times my age, but through me. That’s going to require a huge level of maturity and integrity that I don’t believe I possess at the time. But my heart is with the kids. I want to do whatever I can to make a difference in their lives…instead of moping & complaining about not having somewhere there for me to help and guide me. I’m convinced that God wanted it that way, because now I’ll do whatever I must to make sure no one else has to go through that. It’s time I stop trying to skate through and really walk with God. I’ve finally come to terms with the fact that it’s not about me…I don’t want to split the glory anymore. That was my dream once upon a time…to finally prove myself…& if I could use your platform to do so, then so be it. Terrible concept, but that was my mindset. I wasn’t familiar with “not letting my left hand know what myr right hand was doing.” I couldn’t get with that…but now I realize, the harvest is plentiful, but the laborers are few. I just need to be a laborer. Not an advertisement.

I’m just saying…I don’t want to do the same thing Satan did. He was chosen...given a very important job. He worked alongside you…but he wanted to split the glory. He wanted credit for what he did. He wanted to be noticed and seen. He wanted followers himself…to be lifted up…his pride start’d small & then snowball’d out of control, until he got kick’d out. Lord, because of what Adam & Eve did, I have the same potential and capabilities to completely defile your pulpit and lift up myself, and be kicked out of your presence forever. Lord, I don’t want that. Nightmare.

This is where I stand: I have many desires pulling me every which way at the moment. But God, I know that if I choose to follow my own plan and live without you, I’ll be living a lie…trying to force it into a fairy tale, and that’s just not the way life was designed. Though I’m still in this flesh, I am going to deny all of me, because there’s a greater work to be done. And that work doesn’t require my ideas, input, relationships, capabilities, etc. It only requires my obedience. As my mentor told me,” It’s time to walk in radical obedience.” Lord, I can’t say that I’m completely ready. But if I “wait till I am”, then I’ll never move.

I am excited though. Even though some decisions are painful to make. But they’re extremely necessary. Just as necessary as pain.

So Lord, take my yes and test it however you please. That’ll build character and integrity in me. I’m focused on the long term side of the struggles, trial, and pain. Jesus had to go through EVERYTHING a heavy heart could bear…but it pleased you, because your plan was fulfilled.

I remember reading a scripture and I imagined myself in it. That made it read:

“JaNishia, do you love me?”

“Yes Lord. I do.”

“Well feed my sheep.”

And Lord, I do love you.

Here I am to show you.

#imjustsayin

Cute little baby faced boy.
I fell hard and right away.
But I may have to reconsider based solely on what you displayed today.

I’m thriving and striving to grow
And you’re just yearning to know
“When can we ‘kick it’?”

Time is limited but I try
To please this sweet, cute guy
But what do I get in return?

I just get to yearn…
I get a revelation.
Lesson Learned.

I get to look crazy
Try to work with the lazy…
I get to…

I get to be tempted.
This is what I get from the time spent with…
You.

&it’s not that I’m a mute
I just have nothing to commute
When you act the way you do…

Not interested in no status…
No facebook “I’m a relationship with”…
You.

I’m interested in that guy
That makes me smile when I try not to
And honey…that just ain’t you

I can say that I’ve had an idea all along…
But kept meddling…
But any move from here would simply be settling.
And honey… that just ain’t me.

You’re cute tho.
That fact can’t be rejected.
And that was my only hang up as I humbly accepted that…
I just can’t be with you.

There’s a difference between being lonely and set apart.
And as long as I understand the difference,
I’ll remain clear of having a weary heart

=)

Quick Question.

I once ask'd my Uncle, "Uncle Too...why do we fail tests that we know all the answers to?" With a puzzled look on his face, he simply forfeited the question.

Understand This.

Like my grandfather says..."If you put me on a peddlestool, you won't have to worry about me fall'n off. I'll jump down!"...I feel like...the day you shake ma hand & see holes where the nails have been is the day yu can assume I'm perfect & lay yur burdens on me...until then, understand that I'm human.

What's Bothering Me?

What's bothering me? I'm bothering myself. Knowing how selfish I am. Knowing that God has given me the gifts, talents, and platforms to impact so many lives. Knowing that the only thing standing between me and thousands of hurting people is...me...not knowing, rather realizing what I'm doing exactly...or exactly what I'm not doing. Knowing that the choice to fulfill my destiny is really mine. Knowing, rather realizing, that I just took my life and made it about me. Shameful. Yet Prideful. Ignorant, meaning ignoring all that my Father and I discussed. Blindly banking on His promises, but throwing away all that I've ever promised Him... Buried deep is still the drive! & Since I'm still alive!'...Allow me, Yes Me!...to Rise and take my place. Sincerly apologetic, yet He won't let me forget how deep His love runs for me...For me? Yes Me! Empowered by His love, I Rise. & Pass on. Never to return to this stagnate place again. The End.

...I forgave you because it was the best thing I could do for me...

True Story.

I take the hand of the little girl I used to be…

I tell her to “Relax, baby girl, you’re safe with me.

I know all about you. & I sincerely care.

Allow me to be the person that you always wanted to be there..."

I delighted in her smile, which faded shortly after.

She was unaware of life’s crazy turn into the upcoming chapter.

She was like a deer caught in headlights.

She never asked for anything.

But deceived, she received all that hell could bring.

I looked in her pretty eyes and it broke my heart.

To know she gave up on life before it had the chance to start.

She said the world was anything & everything but kind.

So she attempted suicide at the tender age of nine…....

I said baby girl, what could possibly be so bad?

She said, “You don’t know the experiences that I’ve had.”

I shed a tear in unbelief, yet affirmation.

But in her eyes were flashing lights of desperation.

I couldn’t stare into those pretty eyes any longer.

I stormed away to address the One who was stronger.

“Lord, why? She’s a baby! She’s just a little girl.

And because of this, she’ll probably never accept you into her world.”

I became angry with God! Borderline detested.

But it was at that moment my heart was arrested.

“You should see what I did to my Son. No, I don’t boast

.But I deal differently with the ones I love the most.

I sent Him in the world and they surely abused Him.

But in Isaiah, I told you that it pleased me to bruise Him.

Yes, I am God and control all with my mighty hand,

But it pleases me when such acts fulfill my plan.

I want her to know, but she refuses to understand,

That she will always and forever be let down by man.

But she’s convinced that I’m extremely far.

And that she’ll always be an empty shell housing a broken heart.

Though she’s a baby, tell her for me and help her to comprehend

That this nightmare for her is the beginning of my glorious plan.

Because of her age, this may be hard to believe,

But I’ve always wanted the children to lead.

Let her know that her trials are not about her at all,

And at that moment, she’ll know that she’s called!”

So I forced myself to go and deliver the hope

But every time I tried to relate, my heart broke…

But I forced myself to tell her how her Father felt.

And as the color returned to her face, I felt my heart melt.

I asked her, “Are you ready to talk about it? It’s completely your choice.”

And she said, “As of now, I can’t find the words, for I just found my voice.”

I told her, “No worries babe. Work at your own speed.

But you must endure, for by your story, many will be set free!"

And she agreed!

So I took the hand of the little girl I used to be…

And introduced her to her destiny.

Hey...so...idk wat to say. I think it'll be a waste to speak on me, because I rather show who I am. But I'll briefly give it a shot...this shall be intresting...well...ma name is JaNishia...I'm currently 19, but an oldhead @ heart...sarcastic. jokester. man...I'm a lot. I have a HUGE heart! Love a lot of people, but I've been hurt a tremendous amount of times...but I'm striving to work thru it & grow up & let God develop me. No, I'm not a "Jesus Freak"....that just sounds weird. But I can say I stand for Christ. You'll see. I can't possibly live without Him. Well...this is me...(as of now)...JaNishia.